Who's Speaking?

I was reading a scripture in Jeremiah during my study time.  I had used the scripture Jeremiah 1:5 for a lesson I was teaching back in April, which I would probably do a blog at some point on that scripture as well.

But I decided to go back and read the rest of the chapter. As I was reading the scriptures started jumping out at me. Either I never read it before or it meant something different to me now because of the season I am in.

Here’s what Jeremiah 1:6-9 NLT version says, “O Sovereign LORD,” I said, “I can’t speak for you! I’m too young!” 

The LORD replied, “Don’t say, ‘I’m too young,’ for you must go wherever I send you and say whatever I tell you. 

And don’t be afraid of the people, for I will be with you and will protect you. I, the LORD, have spoken!” 

Then the LORD reached out and touched my mouth and said, “Look, I have put my words in your mouth!”

 Read to verse 19 when you get a chance but I want to just focus on 6-9 for now.

I had my first event on April 22nd, which went very well. But all the way up until the 22nd, I kept wondering if I should do this. All the thoughts I use to feel about myself was somehow trying to creep back in my mind.

I kept thinking maybe I shouldn’t do this, maybe now is not the time. I was wondering why April was coming around so fast. The time for the event was getting closer and closer.

I started to think what the heck am I doing. What if I mess up? What if people are bored? What if they don’t care about what I have to say? All these things the enemy had me thinking about myself in the past I was now thinking of myself again.

But I had to constantly affirm myself and remind myself of the season I was in and where God was leading me at this time.

The day of the event I was getting really nervous because I knew I was the first one to speak and it was my first time really speaking in front of a crowd like this.

I remember praying on the way there asking God to be with me to give me the words to say. I asked him to speak through me and give the people what they need to hear. I didn’t want to be the one speaking. I wanted God to speak through me and I wanted Holy Spirit to lead me.

I felt better after I prayed that prayer. Then my husband prayed for me confirming what I had already prayed.

I remained calm and kept telling myself I can do this. My co-host decided to pray with me right before I went up as well.

There was a lot of praying going on (smiles).

But when I finally went up there I was perfectly fine. Although I had an outline of what I was going to say, I allowed God to speak through me and gave Holy Spirit permission to take over whenever He wanted to.

It was more than I could have imagined because I knew I was giving the attendees what God wanted me to share with them.

I didn’t allow myself to get in the way but I allowed God to be at the forefront of it all.

As I was preparing for my speaking engagement the following week I went to the book of Jeremiah chapter 1. Although I used 1 verse 5 for the lesson, I realized the rest of the chapter was for me.

I was reminded of the fact that God is with me and is protecting me. I’m more aware of my calling through my commune with Him. Although I may feel nervous at times or feel as if no one cares or that I may not be fit the mould or  be good enough (things the enemy wants me to think). God reminds me that He is with me and that He has equipped me for this.

The truth of the matter is it’s not about me, but about the people He has assigned me too and connected me too.

So anytime I get up to speak, I don’t want it to be me (Evelena) speaking, but God speaking through me. I choose to push myself aside and allow Holy Spirit to lead me and God to speak through me.

I never want to make where God is leading me about me. I choose to be used by God and I choose to be a willing vessel for Him.

If you are a teacher, preacher, or just giving someone advice, make sure you allow Holy Spirit to give you the words to say. Because when you let God lead, there will be no confusion, it’ll be confirmation, wisdom and edification.

Thank you for reading

Stay Affirmed


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